When was the last time you did something just because it was fun—something without a purpose, goal, or outcome? Something that wasn’t productive or planned, but simply made you smile, laugh, or feel free? Have you ever thought play might just be the key on how to enjoy life more?
If you’re like most adults, it’s probably been a while.
In our culture, we tend to view play as something reserved for children—something we grow out of when life gets “serious.” But that mindset is one of the biggest reasons we end up feeling disconnected, burned out, and wondering how to enjoy life more.
The Joy You Might Be Missing
A few weeks ago, I was lying on the beach when I heard the laughter of kids splashing in the ocean. Their joy was electric—you could feel it in the air. They weren’t performing or achieving anything. They were just being. Watching them, I thought: When did we forget how to play like that? When did our smiles get replaced by to-do lists?
We often admire playfulness in children while discouraging it in ourselves. But here’s the truth: play isn’t just a luxury—it’s a necessity. And learning to welcome more play into your life is one of the most powerful (and often overlooked) ways to feel more alive, more grounded, and more connected.
Why We Struggle to Play as Adults
If you feel uncomfortable with the idea of play, you’re not alone. Many of us carry beliefs that play is a waste of time, that it’s unproductive, or that it’s something we’ll “earn” once everything else is done. But that “everything else” never ends—and in the process, we deny ourselves the joy and vitality that play brings.
Here are some common reasons we hold ourselves back from play:
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We feel guilty for not being productive
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We associate slowing down with laziness or weakness
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We’ve lost touch with what we even find fun
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We fear judgment or feeling silly
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We’ve internalized the belief that adulthood must be serious
If any of this resonates, know this: You’re not broken for struggling with play. You’ve likely been taught—explicitly or subtly—that play isn’t important. But that messaging is wrong. Play helps regulate your nervous system, builds resilience, and reconnects you to your most joyful, creative self.
What Counts as Play?
Play doesn’t have to be loud or messy (though it can be). It doesn’t need to involve a ball, a board game, or a paintbrush—though all of those are great options. Play is anything that brings you joy without needing to be productive. It’s a break from doing in favor of simply being.
Here are a few examples of adult-friendly play:
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Dancing around your kitchen
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Painting or coloring without judgment
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Gardening and getting your hands dirty
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Going for a bike ride just for fun
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Playing a board game or card game with friends
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Trying pottery or another hands-on craft
How to Reclaim Play in Daily Life
Integrating more play doesn’t mean overhauling your schedule or turning everything into a hobby. It means starting small and noticing the ripple effects of joy.
Try these ideas:
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Do one thing this week simply because it’s fun—no outcome, no goal.
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Notice how you feel before, during, and after engaging in play.
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Talk to loved ones about how they incorporate fun and play into their lives.
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Give yourself permission to be silly, creative, lighthearted, and unproductive.
How Therapy Can Help You Enjoy Life More Through Play
Sometimes, reconnecting with play stirs up deeper emotions—like shame, fear, or sadness over the joy we’ve lost or never had. That’s where therapy can help. If you feel resistance, therapy offers a compassionate space to explore that discomfort and build new pathways to joy.
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Identify and challenge internalized beliefs that devalue play
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Process any shame or guilt around slowing down
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Brainstorm personalized ways to bring more play into your life
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Reconnect with your inner child and create moments of healing through joy
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Understand how play can positively impact your mental health, relationships, and self-worth
Final Thoughts: You Deserve to Enjoy Your Life
Joy doesn’t have to be earned. You don’t have to finish the to-do list before you’re allowed to laugh or play or feel light. You are allowed to enjoy your life now.
If you’ve been wondering how to enjoy life more, start by giving yourself permission to play again. Even five minutes of joy a day can begin to shift the way you experience your world—and yourself.
You deserve that.
